Thanksgiving in West Paterson

Music and Lyric by David W. Jacobsen
Copyright 2011 - 2012. All Rights Reserved.

I was staying with grandma
About which I was not ecstatic
But she could never climb all those stairs
To find the meth lab in the attic

I didn't count on the holiday bunch
And her noisy vindictive niece
Still bitter about me taking her pills
She went and called the police

Happy Thanksgiving
Happy Thanksgiving

So during Thanksgiving dinner
After uncle Claude had said grace
In came Sgt. McSlaughter
An unwelcome familiar face

He wasn't interested in the turkey
Or trying a Petit four
So I threw the mashed potatoes in his face
And bolted out the back door

Happy Thanksgiving
Happy Thanksgiving

As I ran through backyards
On that quiet thanksgiving night
I guessed where you'd hidden your key
To the apartment off to the right

I figured since it was a holiday
It'd be a good time for me to touch base
I didn't think that your husband
Would be so annoyed when I came to your place

Happy Thanksgiving
Happy Thanksgiving

So shortly after I arrived
Your place was surrounded by cops
And I'd only just made the acquaintance
Of your in-laws who really seemed shocked

I guess I should have given up
And just seen the sergeant again
But I figured since it was a holiday
I would sit down and have some champagne

Happy Thanksgiving
Happy Thanksgiving

And so came the blare from the megaphone
For me with my hands in the air
I guess giving him the finger
Was not the best move then and there

And when your sister opened the door
I should have given up at last
I guess if I hadn't of struggled
Your place might not have gotten so trashed

As they took me away in handcuffs
I still stopped to say good night
And wish you a great Thanksgiving
And promise that I would still write

Happy Thanksgiving
Happy Thanksgiving